Archive for October, 2006

Update: Behind The Hits Appearance

Thursday, October 12th, 2006

Bob has been kind enough to allow me to use a sample from Tuesday’s broadcast.  Here’s my appearance:

[audio:http://www.wwmmd.net/tunes/inline/bobshannonjh2.mp3]

You can hear the entire excellent Behind The Hits show in archived mp3 format here.  (Bob Vila in segment 7!  I’m on a show with Bob Vila!)

Forgive me being a bit self-indulgent; it’s just that…hey, wait a second!  This is MY website!  Screw you if you don’t like it!

See you tomorrow for CHART ATTACK!

Adventures Through The Mines Of Mellow Gold 3

Wednesday, October 11th, 2006

mellowgoldlogo.jpg

What’s that? You want some more wussy music? You need some more wussy music? I’m here for you.

This week, we’re only going to cover one song. Why? Because the story’s so good, it deserves its own post.

Benny Mardones – Into The Night (download)

You could call Benny Mardones a one-hit wonder. But technically, you could also call Benny Mardones a two-hit wonder. And he has a pretty interesting background, too, but we’ll get to that in a minute. First, let’s talk about the song itself.

“Into The Night” did well on the charts when it was released in 1980, eventually reaching #11. It deserved to be a hit; it’s a good song. It has deep, heavy drums, dark, minor chords, a subtle piano part, ethereal backing vocals, and Mardones’ strong yet hoarse lead vocal. It features fantastic use of dynamics, and suitably builds throughout. I like some of the lyrics, as well:

It’s like having a dream
Where nobody has a heart
It’s like having it all
And watching it fall apart
And I would wait till the end of time for you
And do it again, it’s true
I can’t measure my love
There’s nothing to compare it to

I think that’s quite pretty. Of course, there’s just one problem: the opening line.

She’s just sixteen years old
leave her alone, they say

(shakes head)
(bangs head on desk)
(goes to call the cops)
(thinks better of it, hangs up)

Great. This romantic song has been ruined for me because he’s singing it to a sixteen year-old. Listen, I’m not saying that Benny Mardones likes little girls. I’m saying this song is not helping any if he’s trying to prove that he doesn’t.

Apparently, though, nobody gives a shit, and nobody gave a shit back then – because, again, the song reached #11 in 1980. And that’s not all.

In 1989, a station in Phoenix drummed up some interest in the song during a “Where Are They Now?” segment. Somehow, word got to Scott Shannon, Program Director at Pirate Radio in Los Angeles. Scott’s been running some of the biggest stations in the biggest markets for the past zillion years. Anyway, in 1989, he added “Into The Night” back onto the station’s playlist, and soon enough, stations around the country were spinning a nine year-old song. Nine years later, “Into The Night” was back on the charts, and peaked at #20.

Benny Mardones may have been a drug addict by then, but he was no fool. If you were a one-hit two-hit one hit wonder, what would you do?

You’d get your ass back into the studio and try to capitalize on the success, that’s what you’d do.

And so Benny went back into the studio, now signed with Curb Records (’cause the folks at Curb Records weren’t fools either), and re-recorded “Into The Night.” The re-release appeared on his self-titled 1989 album (“known as ‘The Blue Album’ to his fans,” his website says!).

I thought about offering “Into The Night ’89” up here for download. But there really wasn’t any point. For starters, you don’t need two versions of “Into The Night.” In fact, you might wind up hating me for it. And there’s really not much of a difference between the two versions. His voice has a little more wear and tear. The instrumentation is a little different – there’s suddenly an acoustic guitar and the bass has a terrible effect on it. We didn’t really need an “Into The Night ’89,” but by golly, we got it.

UPDATE 10 AM: So I go to my mailbox this morning and what’s waiting for me? A pristine, still-in-shrinkwrap copy of Benny Mardones’ self-titled 1989 release on Curb Records. Thank you to you-know-who for sending me this…(struggles to think of the right word)…CD.

So since I have it right here anyway, go ahead, torture yourself. If you dare.

Benny Mardones – Into The Night ’89 (download)

Things went downhill yet again after that for Benny Mardones, but not before he re-recorded the song another two frickin’ times: there’s “Into The Night (acoustic)” and “Into The Night (2002 Version).” The former features some lame ad-libs, and the latter has a voice that can no longer belt the other high notes. It brings absolutely nothing to the table. In fact, it takes things away from the table. Nobody bought it.

Except, that is, for the constituents of the fine city of Syracuse, NY.

Yes, you read that right.

According to the Benny Mardones bio:

Benny disappeared everywhere – everywhere, that is, but Syracuse, NY. With the help of fans like Tommy Nast, then program director at local station 94 Rock, Benny’s music was constantly on the air in Syracuse. In 1983, he played a legendary concert at Longbranch Park with more than 10,000 people in attendance. BennyMania took hold in upstate New York. In 1985, Benny played four sold-out shows at the 3,500-seat Landmark Theater. At his peak in Syracuse, Benny would draw 24,000 fans to a show at Weedsport Speedway.With all his records out of print, local promoters released two “Syracuse Only” records. These included “Unauthorized” and “American Dreams,” each of which sold over 18,000 copies in Syracuse. Benny’s sales topped even new releases by performers like Bruce Springsteen.


You know, when I was 17 and on the search for colleges to attend, I was wavering between a few schools. Syracuse University was one of them. They did a lot to sell me on their school. They said nothing about Benny. Had I known that living in Syracuse would have put me square in the middle of BennyMania…well, shit. Fuck the $35,000+ per year tuition. The chance to get Unauthorized and maybe even get it signed? Worth it all, my friends.

So what’s Benny been up to lately? Well, recentlly – just today, actually – he won two awards! Yes, he won the JasonHare.com Award For Worst Album Title AND Worst Album Cover:

Well, he just beat out this guy for my Favorite Awful Title With The Word “Love” In The Cover. I’m not even going to dignify the bandana with a comment. Maybe my wife said it best when she asked, “Is that a woman?”

I know you’re either thinking this story can’t get any better or when will he fucking shut up about Benny Mardones? Either way, here’s the ending. I’ve saved the best for last.

Benny has a new documentary, entitled (are you ready for this?) Into The Night: The Benny Mardones Story. And according to the cast page, it features such “characters” as Benny himself! Benny’s Mom! Roy Orbison! Wayne Newton! Richie Havens! And this guy!

I am not making this up. I didn’t even put that text on the picture. I swear.

I can’t possibly think of anything else to add – but I’m sure you might, so please feel free to contribute in the comments! And with that, I bid you a very – very – wussy goodbye. See you Friday for CHART ATTACK! and next week for more Mellow Gold!

Appearance on “Behind The Hits”

Tuesday, October 10th, 2006

Our good friend Bob Shannon has invited me to join him for a few minutes during his "Behind The Hits" radio show today.  I’ll be ripping Robbie Dupree to little shreds.  I’m all sorts of excited about it.  This is totally going to top the time I called in to "Kids America" in 1987 and announced the #1 song!  (Am I the only one who remembers "Kids America?"  I used to listen every night.  Anyway.)

If you’re on Eastern Long Island and around a radio, tune in to WLNG – 92.1 – at around 11:10 AM – I’m on during the first segment of the show.  Or, you can stream it using Bob’s WLNG streaming resource webpage.

Tomorrow: more Mellow Gold!

Sun City Video

Monday, October 9th, 2006

The excellent blog Mostly Modern Media offered up some great YouTube treasures on Friday.  While the version of "Down Under" by Men At Work just reminded me how much I miss Pop-Up Video, the real gem of the bunch is Artists Against Apartheid’s video for "Sun City:"

[youtube]o5zW_UGhZZc[/youtube]

Oh my gosh, what a video.  All political messages aside, in this video we get to see:

Lou Reed with his arm around John Oates;
Daryl Hannah and Jackson Browne singing backing vocals
Bono kissing one of the Fat Boys (holy shit!)
Bruce Springsteen shaking his fist in anger

That’s just the tip of the iceberg, folks.

Nevermind that the majority of these artists probably would not have been invited to play Sun City.

CHART ATTACK!#2: 10/6/90

Friday, October 6th, 2006


Welcome back to another edition of CHART ATTACK!  Where were you on October 6, 1990?  Here’s what was on the radio! 

10.  Release Me – Wilson Philips Amazon iTunes
9.  Do Me! – Bell Biv DeVoe
Amazon iTunes
8.  Oh Girl – Paul Young Amazon iTunes
7.  Ice Ice Baby – Vanilla Ice Amazon- only $4! iTunes
6.  Blaze Of Glory – Jon Bon Jovi Amazon iTunes
5.  I Don’t Have The Heart – James Ingram Amazon iTunes
4.  Something Happened On The Way To Heaven – Phil Collins Amazon iTunes
3.  (Can’t Live Without Your) Love And Affection – Nelson Amazon iTunes
2.  Praying For Time – George Michael Amazon iTunes
1.  Close To You – Maxi Priest Amazon iTunes

10.  Release Me – Wilson Phillips  Come on, baby.  Come on, baby.  You knew it was time to just let go.  ‘Cause we wanna be free, but somehow it’s just not that easy.  I know I should do something better here than just quote these lyrics.  But what else is there to say?  All five of the singles from their debut album reached the AC top 10 between 1990 and 1991.  A couple of modest (especially by comparison) hits in 1992, but after that,  it was pretty much over for them.  Yeah.  That’s all I have to say.  I’m not going to say anything embarrassing like "I know all the words to this song" or "I had this CD and played it all the time" or "I gifted it to my buddy Raz and he knows all the words too, and sometimes we sing it together."  Nope.  That chorus says it all.

9.  Do Me! – Bell Biv DeVoe  Like Wilson Phillips, Bell Biv DeVoe really only had one successful album in their arsenal.  Still, there’s not a damn thing wrong with "Do Me!," except that it somehow made it okay for white kids to utter the phrase "smack it up, flip it, rub it down, oh nooooo!"  I still don’t exactly understand all of that phrase.  Flip it?  Can someone send me a diagram?

8.  Oh Girl – Paul Young  Quick, name three Paul Young songs you’ve heard on the radio.  Go ahead, I’ll wait.

Okay.  I personally think you only came up with two.  But if you got three, here’s what I think you’ve got: "Every Time You Go Away," "Oh Girl" and "What Becomes Of The Brokenhearted."  (If you’re a music geek, you may have also come up with "Love Of The Common People.")  Nothing wrong with that, except that every single one of Paul Young’s US hits have been covers.  "Every Time You Go Away" is by Hall & Oates.  "Oh Girl" is by the Chi-Lites.  "What Becomes" is a Jimmy Ruffin song.  "Love Of The Common People" is by Nicky Thomas. 

In the UK, he’s also released covers of "Wherever I Lay My Hat (That’s My Home)" (Marvin Gaye), "Love Will Tear Us Apart" (Joy Division), "I’m Gonna Tear Your Playhouse Down" (Ann Peebles), "Softly Whispering I Love You" (The Congregation), "Both Sides Now" (Joni Mitchell), and "Don’t Dream It’s Over" (Crowded House).  He named his son Levi after The Four Tops’ Levi Stubbs.  Even his offspring is a cover of sorts.  Anybody else wondering how this guy made it?

Paul Young, I award you no points for originality, and may God have mercy on your soul.  At least Robbie Dupree had his own lyrics.

Fun Paul Young Fact:  "What Becomes Of The Brokenhearted" (which we’ll never cover here, as it peaked at #22) was included on the 1991 soundtrack to Fried Green Tomatoes.  Prior to its release, Whitney Houston had been planning on covering it for her upcoming movie soundtrack to The Bodyguard.  Once hearing Young’s release, Houston decided to switch her cover to "I Will Always Love You."

Dolly Parton should be sending monthly thank-you notes to Paul Young.

7.  Ice Ice Baby – Vanilla Ice  The scary thing is that apparently he’s still trying to convince people that he didn’t rip off Queen’s bassline.

The less said about "Ice Ice Baby," the better.  However, as I mentioned above, you can get The Best Of Vanilla Ice, which includes such hits as "Cool As Ice" and "Ninja Rap" ("Go ninja, go ninja, go!"), for a sweet $3.99.  Go without your mochaccino for one morning.  That’s all you have to do.  Be sure to read the "Reviewer Comments."

6.  Blaze Of Glory – Jon Bon Jovi  Who wants to explain to me what distinguishes this solo song from a Bon Jovi group effort?  I mean, when Gwen Stefani did a solo album, it was somewhat different from No Doubt.  Darius Rucker’s solo album was a flop infused with a hip-hop feel, far from Hootie’s work.  Freddie Mercury’s shitty solo albums were nothing like Queen.  And so on.  If you’re going to do a solo project, at least try to do something you can’t do with your current band.  I’m not saying that "Blaze of Glory" isn’t a good song; I’m just saying that I don’t hear anything on the single that Tico Torres couldn’t have handled.

5.  I Don’t Have The Heart – James Ingram  James Ingram is the man.  You know more James Ingram hit songs than you think you do:  "Just Once," "Baby Come To Me" (with Patti Austin), "Yah Mo Be There" (with Michael McDonald) and "Somewhere Out There" (with Feivel Linda Ronstadt).  And yet, "I Don’t Have The Heart" was considered Ingram’s first real solo hit.  ("Just Once" was sung by Ingram but appeared on Quincy Jones’ abum The Dude.)  I just listened to all these songs, and I personally think ANY of them could have been sung by Michael McDonald.  I’m just saying.

My favorite part of this song is that guitar solo.  The backing vocals continue and Ingram sings/speaks, "I DON’T HAVE THE HEART!"  The man has conviction.

4.  Something Happened On The Way To Heaven – Phil Collins Here’s what this song had going for it:

1)  great horn section

2)  Lee Sklar
3)  Video featuring a shaggy dog, with a shaggy dog dream sequence
4)  Shaggy dog doing something nasty on Lee Sklar’s foot.  Poor Lee Sklar!  He doesn’t deserve this shit!  (hahahahahah!)


Watch for yourself.

[youtube]VW7SwXPVqqI[/youtube]

3.  (Can’t Live Without Your) Love And Affection – Nelson (download)  Wilson Phillips, Bell Biv DeVoe, Vanilla Ice, and Nelson…this was a week for one-album wonders, wasn’t it?  Still, I really do like this song.  And "After The Rain," too.  I remember think it would be so cool if I could learn this on guitar and perform it.  Then, I learned it on guitar and didn’t feel much like performing it anymore.

I’m trying to figure out why Nelson didn’t make it big after the early 1990s….hmmmm….

(Yeah, I know, cheap shot.)

2.  Praying For Time – George Michael  "Praying For Time" was the long-awaited first single from Listen Witout Prejudice: Volume 1.  This was before the public knew that George Michael didn’t intend on doing any real publicity to promote the album.  MTV heavily promoted the World Premiere of the video at least two weeks’ prior.  I eagerly sat in front of the TV that night.  And all I saw were a bunch of fucking words on a screen.  What kind of bullshit is this?  And speaking of, I call "bullshit" on anybody who calls this video "poignant," "fitting," or "brilliant." I call it "lame."  No, wait.  I call it "bullshit."

1. Close To You – Maxi Priest (download)  Beyond this song and his duet of "Set The Night To Music" with Roberta Flack, I don’t really know much about Maxi Priest.  He has great hair, though. 

"Close To You" is both funky and sexy, despite sounding like a Soul II Soul song.  And those lyrics are sexy, too:  "I just wanna be close to you/and do all the things you want me to."  Oh yeah!  "Something deep inside of me/wants to love you endlessly!"  Bring it, Maxi!  "A fatal attraction is where I’m at/there’s no escaping me."

uh…what?

Suddenly, I feel differently about "Close To You."  Now it’s one of those songs, like "Possession" and "Every Breath You Take," that sounds almost romantic at first but is really sung from a psycho’s point of view.  This is the only lyric in "Close To You’ that has this vibe, but I think it’s enough for me.  I offer it to you, in case you are stalking someone and want to let them know how you feel.  "Close To You" will do the trick, thank you, Mr. Priest.

And that’ll do it for another week of CHART ATTACK!  Will our next Top 10 feature artists with more staying power?  Come back next Friday to find out!