CHART ATTACK! #17: 2/2/85
Hello again and welcome back to yet another Friday edition of CHART ATTACK! Today we’re going to take a look back at a pretty good week – not amazing, but not as bad as some of our weeks in the early ’90s – February 2, 1985!
10. Neutron Dance – The Pointer Sisters Amazon iTunes
9. Method Of Modern Love – Daryl Hall & John Oates Amazon iTunes
8. I Would Die 4 U – Prince Amazon iTunes
7. Like A Virgin – Madonna Amazon iTunes
6. The Boys Of Summer – Don Henley Amazon iTunes
5. Loverboy – Billy Ocean Amazon iTunes
4. You’re The Inspiration – Chicago Amazon iTunes
3. Careless Whisper – Wham! Featuring George Michael Amazon iTunes
2. Easy Lover – Philip Bailey (with Phil Collins) Amazon iTunes
1. I Want To Know What Love Is – Foreigner Amazon iTunes
10. Neutron Dance – The Pointer Sisters Could someone please fill me in on what a "neutron dance" is, exactly? I looked it up and everything. I analyzed the lyrics. I know that the Pointer Sisters are, collectively I would assume, "just burning doin’ the neutron dance," which leads me to plead, "then for the love of Anita, stop doin’ it! No dance is worth burning for!" Yet in the next chorus, they do admit that they’re "so happy doin’ the neutron dance." So you know what, Sisters? You’re on your own. Do your neutron dance. I’m not going to be held responsible.
I don’t know if I’ve made it clear that I really have nothing of value to say about "Neutron Dance."
The song itself – one of the last big hits for the Pointer Sisters – was from the Beverly Hills Cop soundtrack. I dig this song – good beat, fun synthesizers, and your typical ’80s soundtrack music video, featuring the group interspersed with scenes directly from the movie.
9. Method Of Modern Love – Daryl Hall & John Oates As Hall & Oates songs go, this one is pretty stupid. The chorus is pretty much just spelling, and yet, in order to fit the meter, they get rid of the word "modern" altogether. I expect better from you, Oates. And not to start repeating myself here, but after you’re done educating me on the neutron dance, could you tell me what the Method of Modern Love actually is? Thanks.
Through all of this, including an idiotic video involving the band playing on a roof, Hall falling off and somehow dancing in a cloud, the song managed to reach #5 during H&O: The Untouchable Years. I’ll give them this: the song is definitely different from not only their output but the other stuff on the charts at the time. You’ll never mistake that horn riff for any other song.
8. I Would Die 4 U – Prince This single, the fourth from Purple Rain, was the first of his to use the incredibly annoying numbers-and-letters-in-place-of-real-words approach. It didn’t fare as well as the previous singles from the album – "When Doves Cry," "Let’s Go Crazy" and "Purple Rain," perhaps because it just doesn’t lend itself to singing along like the others. Supposedly fans think this song is sung from the point of view of Jesus, which is interesting because I don’t think I’ve ever made any attempt to listen to any of the lyrics
7. Like A Virgin – Madonna This is really where it all began for Madonna. I’m not discounting her success with the Madonna debut album, but this was the first song that set Madonna apart from the rest. The song was the creation of songwriting duo Tom Kelly and Billy Steinberg, who have written tons of songs you know – "True Colors," "So Emotional," "Eternal Flame," and "Alone" by Heart (which was originally released by Kelly and Steinberg under the band name i-Ten, but that’s a story for another Chart Attack!). Steinberg wrote the lyric – and this makes me a little uncomfortable – while driving his pickup truck on his father’s farm. (The nights get real lonely, I guess.) Steinberg took it to Kelly – primarily a rock singer and writer – and, through much trial and error, wound up with a demo that impressed A&R head Mo Ostin at Warner Brothers. Produced by Nile Rodgers, "Like A Virgin" entered the Top 100 at #48 (aided by her iconic performance at the VMAs), and reached the Top 10 within a month, briefly grazing #3 and becoming the final #1 of 1984 and the first #1 of 1985. This was its first week falling from the top spot.
6. The Boys Of Summer – Don Henley (download) Just think, everybody: Tom Petty could have recorded this one. Heartbreakers guitarist/producer Mike Campbell wrote the music and offered it to Petty, who wasn’t interested as it didn’t fit the mood of his upcoming album, Southern Accents. However, Jimmy Iovine, who was producing the record along with Petty and the Eurythmics’ Dave Stewart, thought it might be a fit for Henley. After hearing the music, Henley immediately wrote lyrics and called Campbell in to produce the record.
"The Boys Of Summer" is a great pop song, both musically and lyrically, and it seems to be one of those songs locked in time. Like many, I equate it with summer (is part of the guitar solo supposed to sound like seagulls?) – amusing because it was released in December – and honestly, I’m not even sure the memory I have associated with the song ever happened. I’ll leave it at that. "The Boys Of Summer" picked up four VMAs, and Henley won a Grammy for Best Rock Vocal Performance, Male.
(Whew, I made it through this one without mentioning the Deadhead line.)
5. Loverboy – Billy Ocean (download) Where have you gone, Billy Ocean? Are you hanging somewhere with Jody Watley? It seems like you’ve fallen completely off the face of the earth. Well, while we’re anxiously awaiting for you to make your well-deserved comeback (Billy Ocean/The Police "Caribbean Queen Of Pain Tour 2007," anyone?), let’s talk about "Loverboy." The second of four hits from Suddenly, "Loverboy" peaked at #2 in late February. With Mutt Lange behind the controls (apparently on a break from AC/DC and, uh, Loverboy), Ocean could do no wrong for a while. Still, how "Loverboy" (which I actually like quite a bit, for reasons I’m not prepared to defend) stalled at #2 and "Get Outta My Dreams, Get Into My Car" made it all the way to #1 is beyond me. Actually, I had forgotten about "Get Outta…" until this very minute. Nevermind, Billy Ocean. You stay where you are. Sting, let’s talk about hooking you up with Terence Trent D’Arby, kay?
4. You’re The Inspiration – Chicago You’ve danced at a wedding or some kind of social event to this song, and if you say you haven’t, you’re a liar. Because even if you hated the song, chances are someone you (formerly) respected liked it – maybe even your mom – and you had no choice. I really don’t care for this song, and yet I know every single word. With David Foster at the wheel, Chicago had never been more successful or more shameless; the proof is in the video.
[youtube]hS1YTCEk_sI[/youtube]
Forget, for a second, the inane plot that, for I guess reasons that only made sense in 1984, features a Billy Idol and Madonna lookalike (not the same person, although that would have fucking rocked). Take a look at the band shots (there’s a good one at about :52): you’ve got a poor saxophone player (I’m sure Jefito will tell us who it is) sitting on a loveseat, grinning like a d-bag, a drummer (I’m sure Jefito will tell us who it is) who’s seemingly playing a bass drum, a snare, and a whole host of electric drum pads, and – this must be a record for a band that used to actually play real music – not one, not two, but THREE synthesizers AND a piano player. That’s potentially 352 keys of suck right there.
Does anybody know how Peter Cetera kept a semi-respectable face on when he whined, "and I want you here with meeeeee" in the first verse? I mean, to say the word, I feel like you have to jut your neck out real far and make an awkward smile. (You just did it, didn’t you? Unattractive, right? That’s why they paid Cetera the big bucks.)
3. Careless Whisper – Wham! Featuring George Michael As the story goes, George Michael was just a fat, ugly teenager on a bus when sweet saxophone inspiration hit him. Michael held on to the song for a few years until Wham! found some success, and in 1983, flew down to Florida to record the song with legendary producer Jerry Wexler. Shortly after the session, the video was filmed in Miami. Michael not only decided against the Wexler recording of the song, but also the video – he hated the ‘fro that the Florida humidity gave him. How someone would decide that Jerry Wexler’s production wasn’t good enough, I have no clue, but Michael re-recorded both the song and the video (with a new hairdo), although a handful of shots from the Miami session were included in the final product. Here’s the original Wexler mix, complete with video.
[youtube]klIDT3-nnyk[/youtube]
"Careless Whisper" was released on Wham!’s Make It Big album, and while it was released in the U.S. as "Wham! Featuring George Michael," it was released as a group effort everywhere else in the world. The irony of this song "featuring George Michael" is that it’s one of the few Wham! songs in which Andrew Ridgeley receives a co-writing credit. The song became the #1 song of the year for 1985, and has remained a favorite, although Michael admits that he feels absolutely no personal connection to the song and much prefers to sing his followup solo effort, "A Different Corner" in concert. Too bad, buddy. You’re stuck with this one.
You guys wanna know sad? I just told you all these facts by memory.
2. Easy Lover – Philip Bailey (with Phil Collins) This song is really hard to sing. I’m not just talking about Bailey’s part, either. Warren and I attempted to perform it with Mike at the ’80s gig back in November, and wound up cutting it at the last minute. I actually think Collins’ part is the harder one, anyway, as he’s belting while Bailey is singing purely in his falsetto. Anyhoo, this song came about while Collins was producing Bailey’s album Chinese Wall. Co-written by Collins, Bailey and bassist extraordinaire (even if it’s mainly in smooth jazz these days) Nathan East, the song was an afterthought to an album that was nearing completion, but lacked a strong single. "Easy Lover" was Bailey’s biggest solo hit, peaking here at #2.
1. I Want To Know What Love Is – Foreigner Two Lou Gramm songs in two weeks on Chart Attack!, but he was much thinner when this one was released. Actually, this one was written by guitarist Mick Jones, and kind of confirmed that Foreigner was becoming better known for its Adult Contemporary ballads than the fist-pumping, arena rock tunes that made them famous and popular in the first place. Still, it must have been hard to turn down the money from songs like this one and "Waiting For A Girl Like You." This song featured a motley crew in the background: Jennifer Holiday (from Dreamgirls), Tom Bailey from the Thompson Twins, and the New Jersey Mass Choir. (Mick, you should have known you were going down the wrong road when you invited a choir from New Jersey to join you on a record.) "I Want To Know What Love Is" hit #1 for 2 weeks before it was uprooted by "Careless Whisper." The band never reached the top of the charts again, but I know I’m not the only one who’s quietly hoping for a Foreigner/New Jersey Mass Choir reunion, right?
That’s the end of another week of Top 10 hits! Catch you back here next Friday for another edition of CHART ATTACK!
February 2nd, 2007 at 8:33 am
Excellent Chart Attack, my friend! And I’m impressed (and a little scared) that you know so much about Wham!
February 2nd, 2007 at 9:45 am
Hey, you want to know why Get outta my dreams was more popular? It was more fun to sing along to when dancing.
February 2nd, 2007 at 9:48 am
I knew none of those facts about “Careless Whisper.” I think I vaguely remembered the song being released here under the name Wham! featuring George Michael, and wasn’t “A Different Corner” released as a George Michael solo song in ’86 even though it appeared on the final Wham! album/collection of leftovers?
Wasn’t Foreigner’s “Waiting for a Girl Like You” one of the longest-running #2s in chart history, parked behind Olivia Newton-John’s “Physical” in late ’81 and ’82 for something like eight weeks? Oh well, that’s another song for another Chart Attack!, I suppose.
I need to look up the original video for “Loverboy” on YouTube. I remember two versions — one was the cool “Star Wars” cantina ripoff/homage version, and the other was a boring Billy-singing-to-the-camera version. I seem to remember “Nick Rocks! Video to Go” (I’m glad I get to use so many exclamation points today) showing the latter version more often than the former, which didn’t make this “Star Wars” fan very happy in third grade.
How many singles did the “Beverly Hills Cop” soundtrack spawn? “Neutron Dance,” “The Heat Is On,” “New Attitude,” “Axel F,” and what else? Patti LaBelle’s “Stir It Up” shows up in the end credits, but was it on the soundtrack? I remember watching the movie in 2003 for the first time in maybe 15 years and being surprised how few songs are actually in the movie. And maybe the soundtrack only had eight songs on it, which seemed fairly standard back in the ’80s for albums (“Make It Big” only had eight songs, I believe), or maybe that’s just how I remember my brother’s cassette collection, but anyway, I expected more songs to be played throughout the movie. George Michael’s “I Want Your Sex” first appeared on the “Beverly Hills Cop II” soundtrack in ’87, didn’t it? See how I’ve come full circle? You’re welcome.
Great work once again, Jason. (Wait, that deserved an exclamation point.) Great work once again, Jason! (That’s better.)
February 2nd, 2007 at 9:55 am
You’re right about "A Different Corner," "Waiting For A Girl Like You" and "I Want Your Sex." Most impressive!
I just got around to reading the obit for Ahmet Ertegun in Rolling Stone, and they feature this quote:
"When I played Ahmet ‘I Want To Know What Love Is,’ about halfway through I look over and he had tears running down his cheeks."
– Mick Jones
February 2nd, 2007 at 10:26 am
Phil Collins has also did some great producer/session drummer work with Howard Jones on "No One Is To Blame" and don’t forget what he did with former Abba singer, Frida, on her fine track, "There’s Something Going On."
February 2nd, 2007 at 10:28 am
I forgot to mention, Jefito should do a pocket guide on Howard Jones!!!
February 2nd, 2007 at 10:40 am
In the interest of exposing Hall & Oates-type video hilarity I faithfully submit this gem of incrimination from Billy Ocean. I nearly literally shit myself laughing at this overwrought piece: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WH1Dm59c6HA&mode=related&search=
"Barboy"? Druids? Floating Pyramids? YES to all!
February 2nd, 2007 at 10:48 am
A pocket guide to Howard Jones is an excellent idea. Of course, I have next to no Howard Jones in my collection, so I’ll need to get all those albums first.
February 2nd, 2007 at 10:49 am
No making fun of Ahmet allowed — he was one badass motherfucker. If he was crying when he heard "I Want to Know What Love Is," it was probably from trying not to laugh out loud.
February 2nd, 2007 at 10:53 am
I am ashamed that I linked to four videos in Chart Attack! and missed this one. I keep feeling like it’s a cheap shot/space filler to link to YouTube videos all the time, but at the same time, I think I probably could have pointed to a video for every single song on this Top 10, and it would have been entertaining. I kept thinking that this period of time was especially fertile ground for artists and their music videos as means of promotion, but forgot to put it in.
February 2nd, 2007 at 10:54 am
I am NOT making fun of Ahmet. Just including a relevant note. But I disagree – I bet he loved the song because he knew how popular it would be with the right crowd.
February 2nd, 2007 at 11:55 am
Howard Jones, RULES. Even Everlasting Love, which is my least favorite of his singles, rules.
Phil Collins is singing the low harmony on the chorus of no one is to blame, which I have to admit, despite my general distaste for Phil Collins, is quite awesome.
Changing the subject, as long as we are discussing YouTube video goodness on this Chart Attack, why omit the Easy Lover video, featuring live vocals on one chorus (right over the actual track), goofy dancing and microphone switching outtakes, and Bailey changing out of his leather suit and into a "Cosby Sweater," perhaps to make Collins feel better about his iZod sweater vest and short sleeved dress shirt.
Changing the subject yet again, you might ask yourself, as I did after reading Py Korry’s comment, "How much DOES Jason know about Wham!" To find out I called him and challenged him to recite the lyrics of WHAM! Rap without consulting the internet and without any time to prepare.
He got about 97% of it. It was impressive, and horrifying.
February 2nd, 2007 at 11:55 am
Thanks for providing the “Loverboy” video, Jude. Still my favorite Billy Ocean song aside from “Love Really Hurts Without You.” I wonder if George Lucas had his lawyers contact Billy’s lawyers back in ’84.
The original version of “Careless Whisper” doesn’t have the same oomph as the do-over. Those string stabs during the “I wish that we could lose this crowd” part in the do-over help boost the oomph factor quite a bit. Has anyone here heard Andrew Ridgeley’s 1988 solo album? “Son of Albert,” I think? Seems like a “Cutout Gone Wild!” to me. Crediting a song to “Wham! featuring George Michael” is like those Isley Brothers albums credited to “The Isley Brothers featuring Ronald Isley.” We get it, guys.
February 2nd, 2007 at 12:04 pm
Yeah, I bought Son Of Albert when it was released. I file it under "Facts I Wish I Had Never Told Jefito."
I only remember two songs: "Shake," which was the single (and received a good amount of publicity at the time, including a big MTV video premiere), and "Red Dress" (which may have been the b-side). "Shake" wasn’t bad, but I sure as hell don’t have the CD anymore.
Mike, I think Phil Collins did a bunch of these "video of us making the video" releases – can anybody back me up here? I can’t remember for sure, but I feel like I’ve seen a few.
I agree about "Careless Whisper," Robert: the released version is way better than the Wexler version. I am just impressed that, after giving the song to a man like Jerry Wexler, he felt he could do better. Of course, he was right.
Wham! Bam! I am! A man! (but not after knowing all those lyrics.)
February 2nd, 2007 at 1:15 pm
I’ll back you up on the Phil Collins video-making videos: In addition to “Easy Lover,” the video for “Don’t Lose My Number” featured him trying to figure out which direction to go in for the song’s video (it’s actually kind of clever, I guess), and the video for Genesis’ “Invisible Touch” showed the band filming each other on the set with handheld cameras. That’s what I love about Phil — it’s like he’s one of US. You know, a regular bloke. Or something.
February 2nd, 2007 at 1:22 pm
Thanks, Dave. "Invisible Touch" was the one I was thinking of – isn’t there a dopey little acapella break in the middle from the three of them? Wait, why am I asking this, I can just look it up, and yes, there it is, at the end. Funny, I could have sworn it was actually good.
I always loved that in the ’80s and ’90s, Phil Collins grew his hair long whenever he played with Genesis. Clearly he was making a statement.
February 2nd, 2007 at 1:48 pm
Phil Collins really is one of us — he was a huge pop star in the ’80s who was balding but not trying to hide it. Kind of shocking by today’s standards.<br><br>I understood what you meant about George Michael rejecting Jerry Wexler’s production of "Careless Whisper," Jason. Michael had some laser-sharp pop instincts for a while there. It’s too bad he shot himself in the foot with that whole "Sony is whoring me out" debacle in the ’90s; "Fastlove," from ’96, deserved to be a bigger hit than it was. And call me stupid, but when an English classmate first told me in the summer of ’97 that George Michael was regularly seen in gay clubs in England, I thought, "George Michael’s gay? No way!" I mean, look at the "Careless Whisper" video. And "Father Figure." And "I Want Your Sex." That’s when the rest of the world replied, "Robert, look at the video for ‘Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go’! Don’t act like you weren’t given fair warning."
February 2nd, 2007 at 5:04 pm
Damn, I’m late to the party today.
For the longest time I thought I was the only one with these inane and useless musical factoids stuck in my head…good to know I am not alone!
As always Jason, excellent job!
(and for the curious among you, there’s a great mash up out there of Wanted Dead Or Alive sung over Careless Whisper and dare I say actually works! I’ve got it linked on my blog:
http://kurtskrap.blogspot.com/2007/01/shake-shake-shake.html
February 3rd, 2007 at 2:49 am
Chart attack=crazy awesome. Great work, as always.
Posting the video for “You’re the Inspiration” allows me to once again ask The Great Unanswered Question: why is Peter Cetera wearing a Bauhaus t-shirt in the video? Maybe with all the synths and drumpads in the video, Chicago were looking for some post-punk edge…
And speaking of Bauhaus t-shirts in odd places–and future Chart Attacks–Donnie Wahlberg wears one in the New Kids on the Block’s “The Right Stuff” video. Once is an aberration, twice is a motif–what does it mean???
February 6th, 2007 at 12:30 am
I always loved Phil Collins’ "Genesis mullet". It made him look like a toupee was sliding off the back of his head. Think he’ll re-grow it this summer? Nah, doubt he can anymore.
And how did Method Man & RZA get away with the blatant Hall & Oates "M-E-T-H-O-D" lift without giving them a co-write? I guess the Wu-Tang Clan really ain’t nothin’ to f**k with…
April 6th, 2007 at 8:42 am
[…] Ahh, the Bangles’ biggest-selling single, reaching #1 in five countries, including the U.S. "Eternal Flame" was another hit from the powerful songwriting duo Tom Kelly and Billy Steinberg – we discussed them back in Chart Attack! #17, concerning their awkward journey writing "Like A Virgin." Susanna Hoffs, who’s also listed as a co-writer , requested that Kelly and Steinberg assist her in creating a tune similar to one entitled "Unconditional Love" that the duo penned for Cyndi Lauper. (Anybody heard it? Not me, but I’m humming the Donna Summer song of the same name now.) […]
October 31st, 2009 at 9:26 pm
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