Archive for August, 2007

Adventures Through The Mines Of Mellow Gold 43

Wednesday, August 8th, 2007

What, you thought a measly little vacation was going to stop me from providing you with the mellowest music on the face of the planet?  Au contraire!

Player – Baby Come Back (download)

When I told my wife I was covering "Baby Come Back" today, her first question (after "why are you telling me this?") was, "didn’t you cover this one before?" That’s exactly what I thought – and exactly what you’re probably thinking as well. But no. I know it’s unbelievable, but the truth is that we have not covered "Baby Come Back." Why we haven’t covered "Baby Come Back," I have no idea. It’s one of the quintessential Mellow Gold classics – probably in the Top 10 of the most popular Mellow Gold songs, ever.

Wise Mellow scholars that you all are, you probably have known for a long, long time that "Baby Come Back" was the work of the band Player. However, I’ll argue that most people haven’t heard of Player, and instead, when they hear this song, think, "Hey! Hall & Oates!" Do a Google search combining H&O and the song’s name, and you’ll find tons of people who insist that Player’s version is a cover of H&O’s version, that Player did the original but H&O wrote it, or even that it was performed by Little River Band, the Bee Gees or Ohio Players (??). I did a search on one of the not-so-legal file sharing services and found only one – one! – version listed under Player. The rest were the above groups, or Vanessa Hudgens from High School Musical, who incorporated it into a new song called "Baby Come Back To Me." (I hear this every morning at the gym. It sucks.)

Let’s clear this up right now: Daryl Hall and John Oates have nothing to do with "Baby Come Back," except for one thing: the song is a 100% bonafide Hall & Oates ripoff. But we’re getting ahead of ourselves: wouldn’t you like to know a bit more about the boys in Player? You wouldn’t? Well, sucks to be you, then.


Player at the 1977 San Bernardino Wigmakers Convention

Player began when Peter Beckett and J.C. Crowley met at a party in L.A. around 1976.  Beckett and Crowley were the only ones that weren’t wearing white pants, and somehow this was enough to strike up a meaningful conversation.  (They’re easy to spot in the above picture: they’re the two people wearing white pants.  Beckett is the one far left, and Crowley is the one far right who kind of looks like the freaky love-child of Jann Wenner and Rufus Wainwright.)  The duo, both singer-songwriters, met up shortly after the party, and realized they had enough in common to form a band together.  They added hunky Ronn Moss (above, trying to hide a hickey) on bass and Moss’s friend John Friesen (the one who looks like a SNL parody of a ’70s rocker) on drums.  Original Steppenwolf member Wayne Cook was later added on keyboards.  Managing the band was Paul Palmer, who was more than suitable for the job, also being the manager for Little River Band.

"Baby Come Back" was the brainchild of Beckett and Crowley.  Both had recently broken up with their girlfriends (as the story goes; I’m not so convinced they weren’t dumped for men with better hair) and one night, over hazelnut-infused hot cocoa and backrubs (not true), churned out their genius tune.  (Note: Wikipedia attributes this tune to Blaine Craven, but a check over at BMI confirms it’s Beckett and Crowley.  Yes, I searched BMI.  No, I don’t know why, either.)

The band had their killer song; now all they needed was a record deal.  Palmer set up auditions with various producers, insisting that the band play live, instead of submitting a demo tape that could merely be shelved and forgotten.  Producers Dennis Lambert and Brian Potter (who had written songs for the likes of The Righteous Brothers and Dusty Springfield) picked up the band, and in turn, convinced Robert Stigwood to sign them to RSO Records.

"Baby Come Back" entered Hot 100 in October of 1977, and in January of 1978 spent three weeks at #1.  In total, the song spent four months in the Top 40 and a massive eight months in the Hot 100.  Two million copies later, Player were being personally asked to open for Eric Clapton – quite a step up from opening for Gino Vannelli – and were named by Billboard as Best New Singles Artist of 1978.  Player had other hits (one of them, "This Time I’m In It For Love," will be snarked around here at some point, I’m sure), but of course, internal feuding tore the band apart.  In fact, Beckett left the band during their stint opening for Kenny Loggins on "The Footloose Tour."  It’s true.  He had to cut loose.  (groan)

In between various reunion incarnations, the members of Player have kept busy.  Beckett wrote "Twist Of Fate" for Olivia Newton-John, included in the movie of the same name that actually made Xanadu look like a masterpiece, and even joined the ol’ Little River Band for a spell in the late ’80s and early ’90s.

[youtube]7LvI3jhf2t0[/youtube]

Crowley left the band and became a semi-successful songwriter, writing for The Oak Ridge Boys, Johnny Cash and Smokey Robinson.  And Ronn Moss…well, Moss gained the most notoriety when he decided to use his rugged, manly looks to further his career as an actor.  Since 1987, Moss has played "Ridge Forrester" on CBS’ The Bold And The Beautiful

In 2007, Beckett and Moss reunited once again as Player.  Look at these two handsome devils!


Moss and Beckett, flexing for your pleasure.

Okay.  So now, you know all there is to know about Player: how they started, how they rose, how they fell, how they refuse to go away.  Let’s talk about the genius of "Baby Come Back," shall we?  For starters, listen to that bass: I’m willing to bet that Moss couldn’t even play the damn thing when he joined the band, but Beckett and Crowley knew the bass part required someone dashingly handsome.  The bass handles most of the verses really, accompanied by light drums and keyboard, and even lighter guitar.  These guys knew exactly how to build to a chorus.

And speaking of the chorus:  has there ever been another Mellow chorus that felt this good to sing?  What a hook!  It doesn’t matter that every single word of the chorus is completely emasculating, as the guys from Player get down on their knees and shamelessly beg forgiveness for ever wronging the girl.  Those layered harmonies, musical but essentially put forth as a shouting plea, are some of the most satisfying I’ve ever heard…until we hit the bridge.  Oh, I love the bridge of "Baby Come Back" – more harmonies building up to Beckett hitting that high "is there nothing left for mee-heee?" falsetto, a few seconds of silence, and then back into the chorus.  It’s genius, I tell you!

Lyrically – well, we’ve already talked about the chorus.  The rest of the song follows suit – it’s a simple MG song about losing the girl, missing the girl, wanting the girl back.  They could be singing anything here, it wouldn’t matter – it’s all about the music.

When "Baby Comes Back," was released, the band was often criticized for ripping off the Hall & Oates sound.  Rolling Stone even published an article at the height of the band’s success entitled "Player, Feeling Its Oates."  I’ve thought long and hard about this criticism, and I think I know why they’re accused of sound like Hall & Oates:  it’s because they totally ripped off Hall & Oates.  Think about it:  the only difference between "Baby Come Back" and "She’s Gone" is that "Baby Come Back" doesn’t change keys at the end.  Same gentle verses leading up to a full, strong, harmony-laden chorus, same general feeling of loss over a woman…they totally deserved the criticism.  For me, though, it doesn’t diminish at all from the song; it’s still one of the best Mellow Gold tunes ever recorded.

Here’s a great vintage clip from the ’70s.  The pitch is a little high on the clip, but you get the idea of how smooth these guys were.

[youtube]Hn-enjcgV1o[/youtube]

"Baby Come Back" certainly has its spot in popular culture:  most recently, Bumblebee plays the song during a scene in Transformers.  And who can forget "Homer Alone," the episode of The Simpsons when Homer and Marge lose custody of the kids?

Simpsons [youtube]BRLQ34IXzkQ[/youtube]

(You’ll note, however, that the version played over the phone isn’t the original.  Beckett, Crowley and Crenshaw do receive credits for "Baby Come Back" vocals at the end of the show.)

I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention how much Mike loves this song.  A couple of weeks ago, we were at our friend’s annual barbecue, an event where we all bring guitars and sing for hours.  From the moment we started playing, Mike requested we play "Baby Come Back."  I can say, almost definitively, that the only people that enjoy Mike and I doing "Baby Come Back" are the two of us.  Nobody else can stand it.  But I love performing it with Mike.  He knows every single tricky chord, really nails the harmonies, and completely makes the song his own: when I sing that line "All day long, wearing a mask of false bravado," Mike gently echoes "false bravado."  He’s the Oates to my Hall Starsky to my Hutch Crowley to my Beckett.

And since you may be wondering, yes, Player has re-recorded this song to bring it into this century; however, they’ve smooth jazzed it up, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to allow any smooth jazz on this site.  Maybe Jeff should play it for Lance Mueller?  You can hear one version on iTunes, and another on their MySpace page.

Have a great week!  See you next time for another Adventure Through The Mines Of Mellow Gold!

JasonHare.com Is Out Of The Office

Monday, August 6th, 2007

Hi folks!

Jess and I are on vacation in San Francisco all this week.  Internet access is intermittent, but I’m still hoping to have Mellow Gold and Chart Attack! posted, although they may not be up at the usual time.  Chart Attack! might also be a bit brief as I wasn’t stupid enough to lug those Billboard books with me across the country.

See ya soon!

CHART ATTACK! #43: 8/1/81

Friday, August 3rd, 2007

We need to change the title of this series this week.


Don’t believe me?  Well, why don’t we take a trip together – a laaaaame trip together – back to August 1, 1981!

10. Queen of Hearts – Juice Newton  Amazon iTunes
9. Hearts – Marty Balin  Amazon
8. Boy From New York City – The Manhattan Transfer  Amazon iTunes
7. Bette Davis Eyes – Kim Carnes  Amazon iTunes
6. Slow Hand – Pointer Sisters  Amazon iTunes
5. Elvira – The Oak Ridge Boys  Amazon iTunes
4. I Don’t Need You – Kenny Rogers  Amazon iTunes
3. Theme From "Greatest American Hero" (Believe It Or Not) – Joey Scarbury  Amazon iTunes
2. The One That You Love – Air Supply  Amazon iTunes
1. Jessie’s Girl – Rick Springfield  Amazon iTunes

Am I right or am I right?  Can someone tell me what was horrible things happened in July of 1981? I checked out the Wiki for the month, and, yeah, some bad stuff happened, but I can’t find anything devastating enough that would have led the record-buying public to suddenly have an insatiable hunger for the blandest, whitest music possible.  They even accepted country music, for crying out loud!

Now, as I related this Top 10 to Mike, he insisted that this wasn’t a bad week; he feels it’s an awesome week.  He may be right.  Not all of these songs are bad.  But you have to agree that all of them are bland, right?  Except for maybe #1?  Well, you be the judge.

10. Queen of Hearts – Juice Newton

It’s obviously coincidental, but I still find it unfair that this is the third Juice Newton song we’ve covered on CHART ATTACK!. This song is stupid, but just like "Love’s Been A Little Bit Hard On Me," I find myself just completely endeared to Newton and the way she hams it up in her videos. She doesn’t get massively injured in this video like the other one, but she wears some cute costumes, and sorta comes off looking like a porn star who’s trying to act in her first Cinemax movie.

[youtube]zpo0v688ATw[/youtube]

Of her seven hits in the Top 40, this one was her biggest, reaching #2 in September.

9. Hearts – Marty Balin 

Whaddya know, it’s our Mellow Gold selection from this week!  What?  You haven’t read it?  Go, go, go!

(I’m so glad I don’t have to write anything more about "Hearts" ever again.  But apparently there’s more Balin in my future.  You guys are killing me.)

8. Boy From New York City – The Manhattan Transfer

"The Boy From New York City" was a cover of the 1965 hit by The Ad Libs. I don’t know how they did it, but The Manhattan Transfer somehow removed all soul from the original, thus continuing the rich BLAND ATTACK! tradition of August 1981. The original was a doo-wop song. This one somehow keeps the harmonies but adds in terrible, cheesy, early ’80s production values. Everyone ate it up, of course, and The Manhattan Transfer wound up winning the Grammy for Best Pop Performance by a Duo or Group with Vocal. They also won the Best Jazz Performance, Duo or Group award the same year, becoming the first group to win in both categories in the same year.

But the song still sucks.

7. Bette Davis Eyes – Kim Carnes (download)

This is the girliest Rod Stewart has ever sounded. 

Just kidding!  Y’know, I always thought that Kim Carnes could have just had one good cup of tea and a strong cough and cleared that voice right up.

Do you remember exactly how friggin’ huge this song was?  Although Jackie DeShannon had co-written and recorded it six years prior, Carnes brought the song ridiculous amounts of success.  It sold more than any other song in 1981 and won Grammy Awards for both Song Of The Year and Record Of The Year.  With 9 non-consecutive weeks at #1, it became the second-highest charting song of the year, behind "Physical."  (By the way, the song that broke up Carnes’ 9-week run?  "Stars on 45.")

Bette Davis loved the song, especially because it made her look cool in her grandson’s eyes.  She wrote Carnes a letter, thanking her for the re-introduction into pop culture, and Carnes sang the song in a tribute shortly before Davis’ death.



One day, I plan to have a hit with a song called "Kim Carnes Throat," and maybe she’ll write me a letter thanking me.

6. Slow Hand – The Pointer Sisters

Almost Mellow Gold, this one bordered on a country song – so much so that Conway Twitty covered it a year later and wound up with a #1 on the Country charts.  Personally, there are a number of Pointer Sisters songs I prefer to this one – I think this one is on the bland side – but the country clearly disagreed, making this song the most successful song the women ever released.  Yes – it’s even more successful than "Jump (For My Love)" or "I’m So Excited," although you probably wouldn’t know it from airplay.  The song was co-written by John Bettis, who’s had his hand in quite a few successful pop singles, including Michael Jackson’s "Human Nature" and Madonna’s "Crazy For You."

5. Elvira – The Oak Ridge Boys 

That’s it.  I’ve officially lost my patience with August 1, 1981.  I’m not taking the blame since I was only four, but I ask this to any of you who were buying records at the time (and that includes you, mom): what the hell was wrong with you people?

"Elvira" is not a tribute to, y’know, that Elvira.  That would have been an improvement, I think.  At least we would’ve gotten a good video out of it.  In actuality, the song was written and recorded back in 1966 by Dallas Frazier, and recorded a number of years later by Kenny Rogers and The First Edition.  However, The Oak Ridge Boys hadn’t heard the song until ’78, when a guy named Rodney Crowell recorded it on his debut album.  Why so many people got such a kick out of combining a doo-wop sound with country is absolutely beyond me, but like every other shitty song this week, the public ate it up, taking it to #5 on the Hot 100 and all the way to #1 on the country charts.

So let’s place blame where blame is due: Frazier wrote a ridiculously stupid song.  My favorite lyric is "’Cause I know that my Elvira’s mine."  You already implied that when you said "my" Elvira, you imbecile!…oh wait, now you’re saying some random giddy-yup-hi-oh-Silver-away crap.  You’re on a horse?  Great.  And don’t think those two key changes are going to save you here.

You gotta check out this video.

[youtube]9VJ6RUmlbLE[/youtube]

We’ve made fun of a lot of bands on here, but I’m willing to go out on a limb and say none have been uglier than Oak Ridge Boys circa 1981.  Is that Charles Manson?  My favorite is the lead singer, who looks like the love child of Oates and Lionel Richie.  And check out the audience shots:  they love this song!  I hate them!

4. I Don’t Need You – Kenny Rogers

This song was Rogers’ twelfth #1 on the Country & Western charts (out of an eventual 20), and the third of eight AC chart-toppers.  We don’t usually discuss these charts ’cause they suck, but I need to mention them in order to illustrate the fact that, whether we like it or not, Kenny Rogers was untouchable between 1977 and 1983.  Also, I have no problem mentioning those charts because they clearly both infected the hell out of the Hot 100 this year.

I was all set to snark on this song, but the truth is…I kinda like it.  I just can’t figure out why.

3. Theme From "Greatest American Hero" (Believe It Or Not) – Joey Scarbury (download)

Oooh, another Mellow Goldie on the charts this week!  Scarbury was hired by the famous Mike Post to record the vocal for the "Greatest American Hero" theme.  Smelling a single, Elektra quickly released an extended version of the song, which made it to #2.  They also released a video, although sensing that Scarbury kind of looked like a male porn star (which meant he was butt-ugly with a big moustache), they kept him safely in the shadows.

[youtube]8b2NBemvt7c[/youtube]

Quite honestly, I really like this song.  I can’t help it.  And it’s actually quite hard to sing – especially when he throws in that key change.  I realized there’s a big difference between quietly singing it to yourself and actually trying to perform it.  I won’t make that mistake again.

Scarbury had another minor hit, but couldn’t match his TV theme success – although apparently he tried, recording "Flashbeagle" for It’s Flashbeagle, Charlie Brown, and this video just made this entire CHART ATTACK! worthwhile. 

[youtube]5nXl93ji30M[/youtube]

I can’t believe this is real…but it is.

2. The One That You Love – Air Supply

The other day, I went over to Hype Machine and looked at their stats on Air Supply. Eight tracks listed. Five were from this site.  I think I’ve said enough about Air Supply recently, don’t you?  So I’ll just say that obviously I love this song, and leave it at that.

1. Jessie’s Girl – Rick Springfield

Finally, some rock on this chart!  I really like this line from the "Jessie’s Girl" wiki"While some try to highlight deeper symbolic meanings of the piece, most enjoy it for its catchy tune and memorable lyrics."  (This Wiki would have been much better had it linked to the "some" trying to analyze it, but they get high marks for calling it a "piece.")

Anyway.  Overplayed?  Yah.  Awesome?  Yah.  And remarkably hard for me to play on guitar.  I’ll always have a soft spot in my heart for any song utilizing the word "moot." 
Deserving, I’d even say, of the Best Male Rock Vocal Performance Grammy.  (You can argue me, but the point is probably moot since nobody gives a shit about the Grammys.)  And just think – if he hadn’t changed the name to protect the innocent, we’d be singing about "Gary’s Girl."  (Actually, no, we probably wouldn’t.)

I found this nifty little album on iTunes called 80s Hits Stripped, and it included an acoustic version of "Jessie’s Girl."  Sadly, it’s in a lower key and I could do without the slide guitar, but have a listen anyway:

Rick Springfield – Jessie’s Girl (acoustic) (download)

…and that does it for this week’s CHART ATTACK!, although I still maintain it was more of a limp slap on the arm than an actual attack.  Will we recover from this wussy Top 10 output?  Only one way to find out: come back next Friday!

Georgie (A Rock Opera Parody)

Thursday, August 2nd, 2007

I know we have some Who fans reading this site.  A fellow Who fan just brought this to my attention:  "Georgie (A Rock Opera Parody)," from anti-Bush site Daily Kos, written by Wayne A. Schneider.  Regardless of your politics, you gotta agree this guy’s extremely witty, and has put together some great parodies.

Here’s just a snippet from "Amazing Blarney" (adapted from "Amazing Journey"):

 
Cheney:   Act dumb and lie, boy
         We have a hostile invasion plan.
         Strange as it seems, your glorious dreams
         Are just as bad.

         Ten years hence, a war as dense
         As dense can be.
         Start it now and become inured
         Through duplicity.

         Falsehoods will surely take their minds
         Where minds can’t usually go.
         Put on the Amazing Blarney
         And say what they should know.

George:   A vague sense of obedience takes over me.
         All at once a bald Cheney I suddenly see.
         He’s dressed in a Navy Blue custom-made suit,
         And his temper can blow nearly up to the roof.

       
More at Daily Kos.

Adventures Through The Mines Of Mellow Gold 42

Wednesday, August 1st, 2007

Note:  Mellow Gold #42 marks the original appearance of the now-infamous Mellow Gold logo.  Although it now appears on every post, let’s re-live the near-unbearable excitement, shall we?

Welcome back to another edition of Adventures Through The Mines Of Mellow Gold! Let me tell you something: today’s post is awesome. No, not because of the song. The song sucks. It’s awesome because it’s time to unveil the all-new Mellow Gold logo, created by none other than Jefito, the man who came up with this series idea in the first place.

You ready?

Click on, my friends:
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