Irene Cara Never Happened
Acoustic ’80s is back in rehearsals and learning new material for a bunch of gigs over the next few months. That means we’re digging through our ’80s collections, picking out songs we’d like to try, and adapting them to our style. And sometimes that means changing the keys on the songs — especially the ones originally sung by girls. To find the right key for me, I use a pitch-adjusting program on my computer.
A couple of years ago, we were contemplating doing “Fame,” which you may remember from a movie, also coincidentally titled Fame. Or the TV show, which, holy crap, was also titled Fame. The theme song was sung by Irene Cara.
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Well, I sure as shit can’t sing it in this key. So I lowered the song by five semitones. And this is what I heard.
Two thoughts instantly came to me:
1) Ha ha ha ha ha ha! I shall name this version “Manly Fame.”
2) You know who this sounds like?
It’s Billy Ocean, seen here at 1/78th of his normal size and holding on to a Pick-up Stick for dear life. Maybe I’m crazy, but to me, the resemblance is uncanny. The key, the tone, presumably the beard — totally Billy Ocean. So at first, I was like, wow, if you lower Irene Cara five semitones, you get Billy Ocean.
But wait a second. What if Irene Cara is — and always has been — Billy Ocean raised five semitones? What if Irene Cara never happened?
Look, I know it’s a crazy theory. But Billy Ocean, though on the scene in the late ’70s/early ’80s, didn’t really hit it big until 1984. What if he was just used by the industry to create Irene Cara? His real name, Leslie Sebastian Charles, is even a female name!
Just think about it. Don’t come to a decision now. But have you ever seen them in the same room together?
We did eventually perform “Fame,” by the way. We just decided to perform it with our friend Jen singing lead.
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March 4th, 2011 at 6:32 pm
This makes me very happy.
March 4th, 2011 at 6:39 pm
Thanks. I can’t imagine “Irene” is too happy about it, though.
March 5th, 2011 at 12:46 am
Never fun being outed.
March 4th, 2011 at 6:40 pm
I find it disturbing that I agree with you.
March 4th, 2011 at 6:41 pm
I have long advocated that we play snippets of the pitch shifted versions of these songs at concerts.
March 4th, 2011 at 7:04 pm
You know who probably has some dirt on this conspiracy? That neon-colored, saxophone-playing duck. He is the Deep Throat of this whole thing, I bet.
March 4th, 2011 at 7:07 pm
Maybe carribean queen is his alter ego…
March 4th, 2011 at 7:30 pm
Holy crap!
March 4th, 2011 at 7:38 pm
I would have said Michael McDonald with a bad head cold, but… Billy Ocean works, too.
Well done, as well.
March 4th, 2011 at 7:55 pm
Fascinating. I have a similar theory about Amy Holland, Michael McDonald’s wife, and McD himself. Listen, original first: http://bit.ly/ftAUji , now a fourth down: http://bit.ly/grLSbr
March 4th, 2011 at 8:12 pm
OH MY GOD, Terje.
March 4th, 2011 at 8:20 pm
Agreed, holy crap! McD might even as we speak be sending jackbooted thugs to take Terje out!
March 5th, 2011 at 2:30 am
Some people still think Donna Summer’s really a man, so why not Irene Cara?
March 6th, 2011 at 12:44 am
1. Michael is really awesome on guitar!
2. Jason and Michael: Next time, please sing the vocal punches in the chorus in the voice of Michael McDonald.
3. I’m so glad you’re blogging again, Jason.
4. Poor Jen had a few bouts of feedback on her mic at the beginning of the song.
March 6th, 2011 at 6:03 pm
Egads! Unreal!
March 10th, 2011 at 5:34 pm
I am in awe of how your brain must work lol!
March 16th, 2011 at 8:19 pm
omg are you guys for real? I am embarrassed for you. I feel like I just went to the worst karaoke I’ve ever seen. And, The Fame? Do you not have any original stuff? And by the way, Greg Guidry is a MUCH better vocalist than Michael Mcdonald. But, you guys wouldn’t know that being that you’re not real musicians. You’ll never make it! haha! And everything you were saying about the meaning of the lyrics – you weren’t even close. I was there with him while he wrote those songs and co-wrote a lot of them myself. By the way, I am his wife!