Adventures Through The Mines Of Mellow Gold 32
Hey, hey! Wednesday’s here! And that means that it’s time to review the wimpiest music on the planet! We do it every week here on Adventures Through The Mines Of Mellow Gold! I can’t stop talking like a ’70s jockey!
Climax Blues Band – Couldn’t Get It Right (download)
I know, I know: didn’t we just talk about these guys? We sure did, just a month ago. Why cover them again? Well, one answer would be that we need to recognize – and dare I say, worship – those bands that are capable of striking (mellow) gold twice. Another, more accurate answer would be that “Couldn’t Get It Right” is going to be part of an upcoming Chart Attack!, and my twitchy little brain goes nuts when I come across a chart featuring untapped mellow-y goodness. So, off we go.
Now, I’m sure you all have virtually memorized Mellow Gold #27, and therefore know the story of Climax Blues Band by heart. If not, have no fear. Here’s the Nine-Point-Recap!
1) Band formed in 1968.
2) Band had no hits that year.
3) Or the next.
4) Or the next.
5) Finally had a hit in 1977 with “Couldn’t Get It Right.”
6) Band had no hits the next year.
7) You get the picture.
8) Band has their next hit in 1981 with “I Love You.” Except for one member, entire band hated it. The guys refused to play on the recording, and never played it in concert.
9) Band changed members, still performs, and yet you continue not to care.
I know: if only I had offered this summary back in #27, you could have saved a good seven minutes! If you remember nothing else, just remember this: these guys eventually turned down “I Love You.”
So although I ooohed and aaahed over “I Love You,” that song only reached #12. I do think it’s the more mellow of the two, but “Couldn’t Get It Right” certainly qualifies as official Mellow Gold. After all, it has the characteristic…uh…the unmistakable…um…the inimitable….wait, what the hell was so interesting about these clowns, anyway? Well, courtesy of Songfacts, let’s let Derek “Yes, I wrote ‘I Love You,’ what’s your fucking problem?” Holt explain what made the band – and this single – so darn special.
Colin Cooper used to sing the lead – the low vocal, and I used to sing an octave higher. And then, because 4 of us sang in the band, we used to harmonize. The fact that we had the dual singing the same line but with an octave split made the sound very unique, and it’s still very unique today. Whenever people use it I think it’s great. That was one of our trademarks, we just used to sing together in unison.
Hey! What a coincidence – this was one of the trademarks of my high school band, too! I mean, it’s not that we couldn’t harmonize, we just, uh….didn’t want to! It’s called “dual singing,” you morons! Or have you not heard of “dual singing” where you live? That’s the problem with you people today – you have your fancy computers, and your “Internet,” and your Twitter, and you don’t take the time to learn about important rock techniques! YOU create something! Like dual singing! Always naysaying! You’re out of the band.
Where was I? Oh yes, dual singing. These guys thought dual singing was an actual technique, and remember: these guys eventually turned down “I Love You.” Dual singing gave this song a lot of its mellow groove, but to paraphrase that chick who sang with Don Henley, sometimes wusscle just ain’t enough. Not only that, there really aren’t any keyboards, and a whole lot of funky, crunchy guitar. What the hell’s going on here? This isn’t Mellow Gold!
But there’s something else. In fact, I think Holt meant to talk about it in his above paragraph. Here’s the quote he leaves out of this interview.
Also, as a group, we had a collective boner for the cowbell. Seriously, we would have had sex with it. We tried to have sex with it. What? The ladies weren’t around, okay? Don’t judge us. Few people know the truth: “I Love You” is actually sung to a cowbell.
I’m trying my best here not to make any “more cowbell” jokes. They were really funny in 2000, and have decreased in humor exponentially each time some douche exclaims “I got a fev-ah!” (Exception: unless it’s me or Mike. Then, it’s hysterical.) The truth is, though, that the famous Saturday Night Live sketch would have done just as well, if not better, if they had gone with “Couldn’t Get It Right” instead of “Don’t Fear The Reaper.” There’s cowbell on every beat of the song. Every. Single. Beat. And you know that shit wasn’t looped; some Climax Blues Bozo was prancing around the studio, hittin’ a stick against that cowbell like his life depended on it. I’m seeing Will Ferrell, aren’t you?
Let’s look at some of these lyrics. For starters, how do you get more Mellow Gold than a title like “Couldn’t Get It Right?” Jesus, that’s like the Mellow Gold Motto right there! The Boy Scouts had “Be Prepared,” the Wusses had “Couldn’t Get It Right.” Unfortunately, this song isn’t about what you think it’s about: it’s not about endless attempts to get a woman to appreciate your sensitivity and subsequent pathetic, whiny self-loathing. Again, Mr. “No! No! I am not going to defend ‘I Love You’ again!” Holt:
The song is about being on the road in America. “Looking for a sign in the middle of the night” being about the old Holiday Inn signs, really, because the moment you saw the Holiday Inn sign, that meant you got a bed for the night.
Their biggest hit is about a Holiday Inn, and remember: these guys eventually turned down “I Love You.”
Well, okay, maybe that’s just part of the song. How does it start?
Timeless drifting, this rock had got to roll
“This rock had got to roll?” You guys turned down “I Love You” but were okay with “this rock had got to roll?” What the fuck is wrong with you people? I understand that “Couldn’t Get It Right” was your biggest hit, climbing to #3, but were you really that far above the simple message of “I Love You?” If Climax Blues Band could defend themselves right now, I’d bet they’d do it with one guy talking in an octave above the other one. Idiots.
I realize that I’m coming off like a little bit of a hater of this song; it’s really not the case. I think the song is solid, with a great, funky groove, but I just find it a bit silly that the guys thought that it was so awesome that it was the new Climax Blues Band standard (and where was the blues, anyway?), and their other mellow hit just wasn’t meeting their expectations. Sorry, guys: when your most prevalent instrument is a cowbell and you’re talking about how happy you are to find a Holiday Inn in the middle of the night and you’re bringing in Robert John to sing octaves above your lead singer, you don’t have much of a leg to stand on.
Oh well. It is what it is, right? So maybe these guys hated the more mellow of their songs, but what they had forgotten was that with “Couldn’t Get It Right,” they were already members of the MG crew; perhaps they should have embraced it. Had they learned nothing from Ambrosia?
Enjoy your week, everybody, and see you next time on Adventures Through The Mines Of Mellow Gold!
May 16th, 2007 at 8:35 am
I wanted to write my comment in both regular text and superscript, to get the two octave effect, but the technology just isn’t there yet.
Jason, I’m an avid follower of the cow bell, but this sound is chunkier to me. Thicker. I’m thinking … wood block?
I kills me to think of these badasses sitting around rejecting “I Love You” at the Tuesday morning band meeting, breaking into the chorus of their all-time badass anthem “Couldn’t Get It Right!” every time Derek tried to make a point.
May 16th, 2007 at 9:20 am
David,
You could be right about the wood block, but here’s the thing: if it’s not a cowbell…there goes half my entry. So I hope you’ll understand that it’s nothing personal, but dammit, that’s a fucking cowbell.
May 16th, 2007 at 10:13 am
Jason, I’m sure you’re right; it’s a cowbell, although just to make sure, I’ll go home tonight and dig out my well-worn 45 of this song and double check. Meanwhile, it’s hard to read you hating on this song. I think the problem is that both you and I know it’s really not a Mellow Gold song, so you’re judging it by the wrong standards. What it is is a weird, funky missing link between Hot Chocolate and early Prince, except not at all danceable. Maybe more like if Quincy Jones had produced Exile’s "Kiss You All Over". Or if Mark Knopfler and that guy from The Outfield took Chaka Khan’s place in Rufus. Anyway, like I said, weird and funky, not at all Mellow, and I love it. This was a seminal song in my late 70’s transition from pop radio to new wave, from Hit Parader to CREEM. I’m not a rock critic, but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night.
May 16th, 2007 at 10:18 am
You’re probably right about it not being truly Mellow Gold, but then again, that hasn’t stopped me before.
I promise you, I don’t hate on it. I’m just really defensive of "I Love You." Those jerks.
May 16th, 2007 at 1:01 pm
OK, I can hear the "looking for America through a tour bus window" perspective now that you mention it. But what of the last verse about NYC, which rendered the singer "just another low-income fatality?" That doesn’t make any sense in the context of the song. I’d also love to know what happened in Philadelphia – he says "Philly fever made me feel alright…but I must admit it got the best of me." Too many drugs? A bad case of gonorrhea?
May 16th, 2007 at 1:02 pm
Plus, isn’t it the tour manager’s job to set up hotel reservations?
May 16th, 2007 at 4:20 pm
"I’d also love to know what happened in Philadelphia – he says "Philly fever made me feel alright…but I must admit it got the best of me." Too many drugs? A bad case of gonorrhea?"Uh-oh! Soon-Yi offered up some very unhappy ending, methinks!DwD
May 16th, 2007 at 4:40 pm
This song came out after Elton John’s "Philadelphia Fever." Maybe it’s a reference to that.
May 16th, 2007 at 5:12 pm
Happy Birthday JH! Taureans unite!
May 16th, 2007 at 5:55 pm
It’s your birthday? Happy birthday, Jason! Geez … working for our comedic benefit on your birthday. What a trouper.
May 16th, 2007 at 5:57 pm
Jason’s birthday? I know what song to sing!! Oh, oh!! How about this?!……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..Is there gas in the car? Yes, there’s gas in the car.Tee Hee, Young Man! DwD
May 16th, 2007 at 6:48 pm
I’ve always wanted to know which "SNL" writer originally came up with that "More Cowbell" sketch. He or she is either thrilled about its permanent place in pop culture or pissed that no one knows he/she is responsible for it. It’s also possible that he/she thought of it as some sort of throwaway sketch until it first played in front of the dress-rehearsal audience.
I loved the line about "This rock had got to roll." Grammar humor is always funny. I also enjoyed the Tenacious D reference. I don’t quite buy "Couldn’t Get It Right" as Mellow Gold, but it’s your Web site and your birthday, so you do what you want. My brother’s always liked this song, as have I. (I believe I just used correct grammar. Maybe not. Don’t tell our dad, who’s an English professor.)
May 16th, 2007 at 8:52 pm
I think it’s a cowbell, and I’m not saying that because it’s your birthday. And yeah, I think someone had to run around the studio playing it, because I’ve accounted for all four of the drummer’s limbs with the mildly intricate hi-hat figure, snare and bass.
Whenever I think of two voices an octave apart, I think Squeeze’s <i>Take Me I’m Yours</i>. They’re touring, you know.
May 16th, 2007 at 10:03 pm
Great tune, always reminded of Sly Stone, actually — think "If You Want Me To Stay".
And that’s definitely a wood block, sad to say. But that’s in the cowbell family, no?
May 16th, 2007 at 10:44 pm
Good call on the Sly Stone sound of it!
So is Squeeze touring with both Dilford and Tilbrook? (I think those are their names.) They weren’t speaking to each other when VH1 did “Bands Reunited” a few years ago. That show, of course, isn’t sleazy enough for VH1 these days, so I’m guessing it’s been shoved over to VH1 Classic.
May 17th, 2007 at 5:23 am
Squeeze is in fact touring and it is, in fact, Difford and Tilbrook. I’ve already weaseled my way into seeing them at A.C.’s Borgata in August. Sometimes whining works, people. Word to your mother. There’s no way the Squeeze name could be justified without them, at least in my mind. Then again, there WAS a version of E.L.O. without Jeff Lynne for awhile, which is like saying there’s a Bruce Springsteen tour happening but Bruce ain’t a part of it… or Kelly Clarkson is touring and will not be singing songs about either being victimized by or shunning bad relationships… DwD
May 17th, 2007 at 7:26 am
Having listened to my 45 of the song a couple of times this morning, I gotta admit I’m hearing some wood block in there. But I also can’t shake the sense that there’s also some cowbell. Maybe the Will Farrell precursor was hitting a cowbell with a wood block. And by the way, the flip side of the single is an absolutely abysmal bluesy cock-rock thing called "Sav’ry Gravy". Not Mellow, not Funky, just sad. Happy Birthday, Jason!
May 17th, 2007 at 8:50 am
I feel a small but satisfying bit of vindication. To celebrate, from now on I ask that you all refer to me, much like George Costanza and “T-Bone,” as … WoodBlock.
May 17th, 2007 at 8:53 am
Dual singing.. kind of like what Bananarama did (only they took it to a new art form – tri-singing?)
Personally, I’m hoping for a Climax Blues Band trifecta – with their follow-up almost hit to "I Love You". Don’t forget the disco-esque "Gotta Have More Love" (of course, disco was over for a year by then). These guys truly mellowed every genre that they took a stab at.
May 17th, 2007 at 10:06 am
I thought it was interesting in the Squeeze episode of “Bands Reunited” that VH1 tried to reunite the 1987 “Hourglass” lineup of the band. Is that one even considered the “classic” lineup? It reminded me of when the Velvet Underground reunited in the early ’90s for those European shows but didn’t invite Doug Yule, who was with the band longer than John Cale. But Cale was considered part of the “classic” lineup. Poor fuckin’ Doug Yule … I guess he’ll always be held responsible for that final “faux” Velvet Underground album, which was called “Squeeze,” right? And that’s where the band Squeeze got their name. Full circle! (No wonder Squeeze’s reunion made me think of Doug Yule.)
Have you ever looked on allmusic.com for “I Love You”? According to that site, it only appears on three albums or compilations over the past 27 years. Can that be correct? It seems like it would’ve shown up on a bunch of soft-rock compilations in that span of time.
May 17th, 2007 at 3:13 pm
I could go for the appeal to authority (a logical fallacy, I was taught in school) and bet that I’m the only person here who performed a percussion ensemble piece written entirely for wood blocks. (Please, hold your applause … no, really.)<br><br>But I see some room for doubt here. I’m still thinking it’s a cowbell, in part because most wood blocks have a bit of an echo that I’m not hearing. But I’ll grant that’s it’s easy enough to take out that echo and process the sound so you hear more of a metallic "dink!"<br><br>Now if anyone has any questions about to use socks as tympani mutes, please let me know. (Hint: Ankle socks are better.)
May 17th, 2007 at 5:07 pm
Most people consider the ultimate Squeeze line up to be the "East Side Story" version with Paul Carrack and, oddly through the power of production, Elvis Costello. Personally, my first Squeeze album was "Cosi Fan Tutti Frutti", so I gravitate to that Jools Holland line-up most. And in another aside, David Gilmour is the king of dual singing (which was not the song by Go West, ‘natch, but would be hilariously ginchy if it was).DwD
May 19th, 2007 at 1:09 pm
Turns out that “Couldn’t Get It Right” is on a compilation called “Mellow Rock Hits of the ’70s.” D’oh! The birthday boy wins again!
May 19th, 2007 at 11:47 pm
Yeah! I’m vindicated! Thanks, Sgt. Waxer!
May 20th, 2007 at 9:49 am
Will you go to lunch? Go to lunch! WILL YOU GO TO LUNCH?!
May 25th, 2007 at 8:00 am
[…] The EP starts off strong with “The Man,” featuring a dual vocal technique where the backup singer sings the same line and melody as the lead singer, but only an octave lower. (I wonder if these guys were fans of The Climax Blues Band?) This is a great lead-off track and perfectly sets the mood for the next 26 minutes. […]
June 8th, 2007 at 3:57 pm
[…] 22. “Couldn’t Get it Right”/Climax Blues Band. (falling) Y’know, when our friend Jason brands one of the treasured songs of my youth as Mellow Gold, I die just a little bit inside. Well, OK, not “die,” but I start to feel old and uncool. It occurs to me, however, that I might have been uncool even in 1977, and if I didn’t care about it back then, I shouldn’t care now. So Jason, with all of the respect that’s due to one of my favorite music bloggers, about this song? Bite me. “Couldn’t Get it Right” is a fine, funky clatter that had been on the radio every 90 minutes all spring for good reason, becoming their biggest hit. […]